Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
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