oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
how do flat chested girls get laid?
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
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