Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
And you know what the worst part is? Because of him I can now relate to a goddamn Taylor Swift song. FUCK. MY. LIFE.
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
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