used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
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