she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Randomize
