The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
I woke up wearing nothing but 7 partially eaten candy necklaces. Only one was around my neck. Don't even try to tell me I don't need plan B.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
dude. I can hear the air.
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
Randomize
