so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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