Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Randomize
