toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
I've spent so much time on tinder lately I just tried to left swipe an instagram photo of my neighbor
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Randomize
