I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
Randomize
