so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
Ladies don't puke and tell
Randomize
