So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
Randomize
