Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
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