If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
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