Hey dude. Went to the hospital. Call me when you get up
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
Randomize