We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
I woke up this morning to my panties draped around the neck of an empty bottle of bulleit. That is the perfect visual metaphor for my life at this juncture.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
Randomize
