I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
this hospital has no fireball
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
You couldn’t remember the word hand jibber. Instead, your drunk ass offered the bartenders “unlimited hand fritters” if they wouldn’t cut you off.
Randomize
