So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
Is this like a preordered booty call?
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Randomize
