8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
He jacked off on my pillow when he found out I left. It was like coming home and finding that your dog, with separation anxiety, had pooped in your shoes. I think I'm flattered...
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
Randomize
