He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
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