I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
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