I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
Randomize
