What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
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