I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
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