well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
he laminated a picture of his dick.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
Get my husband this drunk again I will rip off your balls off with my bare hands and then cut them up with a dirty axe like fish bits. Do you understand me? DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME?! See you at breakfast, FUCK FACE. I'll shove that bottle of Jamison so far up your ass you'll still be praying in 2020 you can take a shit! Seriously, you make it hard to be your best friend.
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
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