turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
Randomize
