it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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