Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
this must be what syphilis tastes like
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
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