Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
Randomize
