There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
dude, i woke up naked in her front yard...apparently i tried to leave in the middle of the night, forgot my clothes and decided,"oh heres a nice patch of grass to sleep on" I think god is up there laughing at me.
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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