Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
Randomize
