you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
Randomize
