He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
Randomize
