There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
