We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
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