You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
I have never pre-planed for a better sober morning than lacing my muffin batch with tylenol.
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
Randomize