i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
