we're blogging at a bar
He had one of those small greek statue penises
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
Randomize
