In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
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