My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
our cab driver is having phone sex.
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
How did you make it to work sans hangover?
4 words: Clif Bar soaked in tequila. Just like albert pujols
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize
