No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
Sorry, my phone died and I decide to charge my vibrator instead. #priorities
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
Randomize
