No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize
