Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
My boss asked me to pass over one of my business cards and instead I had condoms fall out of my wallet, how’s your day going??
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
