what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
Randomize
