Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
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