You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
Randomize
