She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
I bet he’d be surprised by the epic blow job he’d get if he stopped talking about his wife long enough for me to get in the mood
Randomize
