yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
Randomize
