why didn't you poke me back
The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
Randomize