How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
I peed in my sheets during a dream. Like straight up. A whole new drunk.
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
